The facts about lunch
A little girl runs out to the yard where her father is working, and asks him, "Daddy, what's sex?"
Her startled father sits her down, and tells her all about the birds and the bees. He tells her about conception, sexual intercourse, sperms and eggs.
He goes on to tell her about puberty, menstruation, erections, wet-dreams... and, he thinks -- what the hell -- and goes on to tell her the works.
He covers a wide assortment of topics and by the time he's finished, his daughter is somewhat awestruck with this sudden influx of bizarre new knowledge.
Her father finally asks: "So what did you want to know about sex for?"
"Oh, mommy said to tell you lunch would be ready in a couple of secs..."
Three Men
There were three stranded men walking down a sandy beach on a deserted island. They walk a little ways and find a magic lamp. So they decide since they are stranded that they might as well rub it. After they rub it a genie pops out and says each one has one wish.
The first man wishes he was at home making love to his wife. POOF, he's gone
The second man wishes that he was at his favorite strip club, drinking a beer with his friends. POOF, he's gone.
The third man doesn't know what to do, so he thinks for a minute and says, "hmm, you know i really wish those two were back here to help me make my descision."
Three Bees
There were these three bees trapped in a hive. The first one went up to the third bee and asked doeshe know how to get out of the beehive. The third bee said, “Suck my dick and I'll tell you.” So the first bee did what he was told to do. After he was done the third bee told the first bee, “Fly all the way up and hit the top as hard as you can.” So the first bee did it. He died when his head hit the beehive.
Then the second bee went up to the third one and asked, “How do I get out of here?” “Suck my dick and I'll tell you,” said the third bee. So the second one did the same as the first one did. After he was done the third bee said, “Fly up fast as you can and hit the top of the beehive hard as you can two times.” So the second bee flew up as hard as he could and hit his head on the hard beehive wall. He died in a heart beat. How do you think the third one got out? Suck my dick and I'll tell you.
There was just a dog fight
A man walks into a bar one day and asks, "Does anyone here own that rottweiler outside?"
"Yeah, I do!" a biker says, standing up. "What about it?"
"Well, I think my chihuahua just killed him..."
"What are you talkin' about?!" the biker says, disbelievingly. "How could your little runt kill my rottweiler?"
"Well, it seems he got stuck in your dog's throat!"
is it michael jackson
little boy : mummy is god a girl or a boy?
mummy: why god is both girl and boy
little boy: mummy is god black or white?
mummy: why god is both black and white
little boy: mummy is god gay or strait?
mummy: why god is both gay and strait
little boy: mummy is god Michael Jackson?
my friends
